04/25/2021 - Black Panther - Blocks and Bears at BP
AO: Black Panther
When: 04/25/2021
PAX:
Number of Pax: 13
Pax Names: 5-Putt, Boxcutter, DJ Sump Pump, Enron, Half Price, Handy Manny, HH Gregg, Judge Smails, Milton, Paper Tiger, Parks and Rec, Sosa, Toasted Coconut,
DR Names:
Number of FNGS: 0
FNG Names:
QIC: 5-Putt
Introduction
It was a beautiful morning for golf. The rain held off overnight so course conditions were perfect. When I arrived, I noticed Judge Smails had already started a warm-up 9. There were only a few HC’s last night, so of course I only reserved two tee times. I didn’t know 15 people were going to show up, causing a log jam on the first tee. DJ Sump Pump actually arrived early for once in his life, and was super pissed to see there was a wait on the first tee. It also didn’t help that Boxcutter was in the first group and lost two balls off the tee. Then Judge Smails teed up a shiny white Top Flite, boldly pronounced, “I never slice!” and promptly fired his tee shot into the pond on the right. We didn’t even know there was a pond at BP. Eventually we were all on the course. Except HH Gregg who showed up late. Nobody complained that Elway wasn’t there.
Sosa hadn’t played golf in years, so he was pretty much just out for the beer. But we didn’t see the bev cart girl for four holes. Later we found out she was by the practice green talking to DJ Sump Pump the whole time. She happened to be a fan of house music and his reputation preceded him.
Milton took off like a banshee by playing speed golf—he kept running to his ball in between shots and waited for nobody…and boy is he fast!
On the third hole, Handy Manny hit his ball into a gaggle of mean geese and didn’t know what to do. So Enron came to the rescue by whirling his putter overhead and making loud “whooping” noises until they scattered. We gave Handy Manny a free drop because of all the goose crap that was left behind.
Half Price and Toasted Coconut decided to play a little match, but that didn’t last long because Half Price smoked one about 310 down the middle and Toasted Coconut gave him the finger, conceded the match, and went to the bar to start drinking.
By the sixth hole we realized Parks and Rec was missing. We eventually found him talking with the bev cart girl—DJ Sump Pump was still there too. At first we though Parks just had mad game, but then we realized he had been debating with her for a couple hours about the difference between carrying a golf bag and a ruck sack.
Paper Tiger ran out of balls by the seventh hole and walked in. He had no idea the rest of us had carts, so he was pretty upset that he had been walking the whole time.
It turns out nobody finished except Judge Smails. But it didn’t matter because when he went to collect his skins money he realized everybody blew it on Fireball shots at the bar. He yelled at them and called them fools because Fireball shots are free all summer long in Bailout’s garage.
Ok, so none of that actually happened. But there was a lot of bitching and moaning (a.k.a. mumblechatter) about how this was “supposed to be a golf workout.” Well instead of playing golf we did the following:
Warm-O-Rama
SSH (20)
Tappy Taps (10)
Goofballs (10)
Good Mornings (10)
Arm Circles (10/10)
The Thang
10 blockees, in cadence.
25 curls.
50 yards Blocks & Bears.
25 curls.
50 yards Blocks & Bears.
25 curls.
Run 0.25 miles.
10 waving burpees, in cadence.
Run 0.25 miles.
10 star burpees, in cadence.
Run 0.25 miles.
10 double-jump burpees, in cadence.
Mosey to hill.
Tourniquet’s “Stairway to Seven” up the hill:
1 burpee, bear crawl 1/3 way up the hill, 1 merkin, bear crawl another 1/3 way up the hill, 1 big boy, bear crawl to the top of the hill, 1 squat. Run to bench. Rinse and repeat with 2 exercises at each stop…repeat up to 7 rounds.
Mosey back to parking lot.
10 blockees, in cadence.
25 curls.
50 yards Blocks & Bears.
6 MOM
American Hammers (30)
Freddy Mercury’s (30)
Swimmers (20)
Hold plank until 8:00am
Circle of Trust
I believe a CoT should be thoughtful, and I believe it is thoughtful to be thankful—so I like to share what I am thankful for during my CoTs. Today I am thankful for having the opportunity to lead a workout at BP with a group of guys who are laid back.
When I joined F3 Naperville, I started at The Ridge and split my time between The Ridge and Black Panther. During the COVID shutdown I was working out at BP three days per week and really enjoyed the comradery at this AO. After COVID, F3 Crossroads was formed and I was instantaneously not part of Naperville anymore! There was a weird divide that grew between some of the BP regulars and the Crossroads gang, and I didn’t like it. But I really liked the laidback culture that has come to identify Crossroads—everybody pushes each other to get stronger while having fun doing it. I post now and then at other AO’s in Naperville and have witnessed a growing culture that has a negative impact on many people. There is a lot yelling and harassing that is probably well-intentioned (to push people to get better), but it is being negatively received. I know of 2 people who stopped coming to F3 because of this. Today at BP I witnessed a lot of fun. I hope more of the BP regulars make the trip down to Crossroads more often—The Ridge is only 8 minutes from BP and our cultures are very similar.
Naked Man Moleskin
Had a blast today. Was bummed there were only a few HC’s last night–but glad to see a good turnout, especially because only a couple of the PAX knew me. But I’ll get back on the Q sheet and I’ll be bringing more people from Crossroads up to BP…hopefully everybody at BP will do the same down south.